Incurable

Doctor, oh doctor!
What's wrong with me?
I'm tired,
I'm nauseous,
I'm as worried as can be!

My head throbs and my eyes blur.
My mind is a mess.
On top of it all,
I'm bogged down
with stress.

I can't sit, can't sleep
can't pay attention.
I can't remember anything
that I do, ask
or mention.

I'm nervous, frustrated
and anxious as well.
Have you heard of this?
Is it normal?
Does it ring a bell?

My back aches, my hair breaks
and it just looks so dull.
I wash, rinse
and repeat
but it never looks full.

I used to be pretty.
I used to smell good.
Now I'm ugly
and smell like
a rotting corpse should.

My legs have veins
that look like ropes.
My butt looks like
those big ski slopes.
I feel devoid of dreams and hopes.

I used to be able to do so much.
I used to laugh and have fun.
Now all I can do
is hope and pray
that I last until day is done.

Dark circles hang out under my eyes.
Wrinkles adorn my face.
What could be causing this?
What have I done?
Is this some rare bird flu case?

Please tell me, doc.
I can take it, I'm sure.
Is it mental, is it fatal?
Bacterial, or viral?
Is there even an affordable cure?

Doc looked at me
with a wrinkled white brow.
"You're ailment is common.
Most women contract it
and I'll tell you how.

The proper name
is Motherhood.
It's genetic and infectious.
It has lasting effects
both terrible and good.

It cannot be cured
while you still have breath.
The cure,
I must tell you,
only comes in death.

Fear not, Mrs. Prescott
This is the worst stage.
This Motherhood you've contracted
though painful and tough,
will only get better with age!"

I left the good doctor,
in a state of relief.
Despite my insanity
and broken down body
I feel better and have far less grief!